If You Don't Know Me By Now

I'm in a pretty foul mood today. Things started out okay; I slept fairly well and I got ready for work. Benji was happy, and he ate his grits & eggs for breakfast. So I put on my makeup, packed up the boy's backpack, and went out to the car. I then realized that I didn't have a carseat. I had taken it out of my car yesterday to give to Lexy, since she was watching Benji for a bit longer than usual. I assumed Allen would have brought it in so I could put it back in my car. Nope. No carseat means no taking Benji to Lexy's, which means I can't go to work. I called my charge nurse and told her that I didn't have a carseat, and luckily she was able to give me VLC (voluntary low-census, or being called-off) until 3pm, so it doesn't count as a sick call. Anyway, since I had some unforseen time, I washed dishes (we have a dishwasher, and it still took me an hour) and moved the laundry and took out the trash and swept the floor and picked up the living room and fed the boy. About this time, Benji started feeling yucky. He still has a lingering cough from the RSV (lingering, or it might be a new bug . . . who knows), and he has been fairly constipated lately. Poor little guy. I'm sure he puked yesterday, since I put his clothes from yesterday into the wash, and they smelled nasty, as did his bedding. So he ate a little for lunch, had a big poopy blow-out, and I put him down for a nap. He didn't even want his sippy--he just got into his preferred position (on his knees, his face on the mattress and his bum in the air) and went right to sleep. I felt so bad for him. I had texted Allen when I realized I wouldn't be going to work, telling him I wasn't very happy. So between my being really annoyed with Allen and having my baby not even smiling at me, I was a grump. Let me tell you why I was (am?) so annoyed. Allen has been bugging me to make dentist appointments; apparently he is unable to do so himself. I called the dentist yesterday, and the soonest they could get me in for a morning appointment is June 5th. They did have an opening at 4pm on Monday, but I had to work. They offered it to Allen. I texted Allen to see if he wanted it, and he did, but I had to arrange everything with Lexy and with the Dentist and I had to send him an e-mail with the address, etc. I decided that it would be better if Benji stayed with Lexy until Allen was done with the dentist, so he could get a good nap in the afternoon. So I packed up a bunch of food and let everyone know what was happening, then I went to work for 12-hours. I usually ask Allen to do one thing while I'm at work (i.e., moving the laundry, taking out the trash, etc.). I e-mailed Allen with the directions to the dentist and I gave him a choice of things to do that would be good since he had a few hours without Benji. He didn't do either, and that pissed me off. He knows that the garbage is his job, but it was still overflowing when I got home last night. I think all of it just put me into a really bad mood, and I vented it by cleaning this morning; at least something good came of it. When Allen got home from work today, I was folding clothes. He sat down and helped me, and then he wiped down the kitchen counter (without being asked). I know he felt bad and he was trying to make it up to me, but it still irks me that the only time he helps out around the house is a)if I'm cleaning, or b) I give him a very specific job to do, and he doesn't do that half the time if I'm not there to keep him on task. I know he does a lot--he pays most of the bills, he works ungodly hours at a job he dislikes intensely, he fixes things (the brakes on his car went out on Saturday night, and he was able to fix them himself on Sunday--ox in the mire), he cooks, he drives so I can sleep, etc. He does a lot of good things, and I have to remind myself of that often. It's just frustrating how I feel like I have to coddle him. Is it really so difficult to look around and see what needs to be done and to just do it? Should I have to remind him to brush his teeth? I know I shouldn't be venting here, but this is my (alas, very public) journal. I need to get it out. Allen reads this occasionally, so maybe this will help him see where I'm coming from and why I wasn't in the mood to talk to him before I left for work today. Maybe. But I'm not holding my breath.