Where You Invest Your Love, You Invest Your Life

I feel like I need to catch up on my crazy life.  Since it's quiet at work right now, we'll see how far I can get.

1.  Benji's school.  

Last February, when we found out that Benji did not receive a scholarship to attend the Carmen B. Pingree Center for Children with Autism next year, we put in his name for a lottery for Spectrum Academy, a charter school. for autistic children.  We didn't hear anything back from them, so we spent months in meetings and evaluations and phone calls trying to get Benji placed within the Granite School District.  We decided on Whittier School, which is a nice, big elementary school with quite a lot of resources.  His teacher is really cute, his entire class would be made up of autistic children, they are piloting a new program this year, his classroom is directly across the hall from the school nurses (yes, plural!  And actual RNs, not just an LPN), and they would bus him to and from school.  We were all set to start school on Wednesday, August 28th.

The Thursday before (August 22nd), Allen and I each received an e-mail:

Congratulations! Your child was selected to attend Spectrum Academy for the 2013-2014 school year.

Student Name & Grade: Benjamin Cox, AM Kindergarten

Please feel free to contact us with any questions you might have.

We have attached some paperwork that we need you to go through and complete. We will also need a copy of your child's immunization record, birth certificate and IEP (if applicable) by Friday, August 21st in order to secure your child's spot for our upcoming school year. Please let us know by phone or email as soon as possible if you would like this spot.

If you would like, you can call and schedule a tour. Please call and schedule it at 801-936-0318 option 1. Your child is invited to attend if you like.

Please let me know if you have any questions.

Wendy Hansard

Office Manager - Elementary

Spectrum Academy

Truthfully, I didn't know what to do.  I felt really good about sending him to Whittier--it seems like a really great school.  Plus it would be super convenient for me, and I don't need more stress in my life.  I called them on Friday to see if we could go check it out, but everyone in the building was out for medical training.  So we went on Monday, 8/26.  It is a nice, small school, and the Kindergartens have 6 kids in them.  SIX.  And once you are in, you don't need to apply for the lottery again.  They said, "He's ours until you take him out."  That's something--to not have to worry about where he will fit in next year, or even after that, because they go all the way through high school.  

Allen was really pushing for us to accept the placement (especially since there were 70 other kids on the waiting list who would have taken his spot if we said no), and although I didn't really feel like it would be better than Whittier, I agreed.  

Benji on his first day of Kindergarten @ Spectrum Academy 

So last Tuesday was his first day of school.  It has been good thus far; it's just the drive.  There is no bussing.  There are carpools, but his class is at a weird time, and I just haven't had time to deal with it yet.  So he needs to be there at 11:45am (having eaten lunch already--the school doesn't even have it's own lunchroom!), and he is picked up at 2:45 (I think . . . Allen takes him home).  It's 18 miles away, about 25-30 minutes of drive time.  It is only 6 miles from Allen's work, so he hangs out there to take him home (unless he's doing is game thing, "hacking portals" and such).  It's growing on me; I think it will be a good place for him eventually.  It takes some getting used to, and the cost of gas is fairly significant.  I feel like we need a commuter car, but money is a bit of a problem right now too.  Ugh.

Anyway--moving on.

2.  Concerts.

On Friday, August 23rd, I went with my concert-buddy Allison to see fun. at Saltair.  Tegan & Sara opened (they are okay; I'm just not that into them).  

Me and Allison @ Saltair

It really was a great concert.  I'm not a huge fan of fun., but they put on a great show.  The energy was awesome, and they sound FANTASTIC live! I think that's the acid-test of a band's talent.  If they can sound as good or better than they do on the album, then they are worth investing time and money into.  We were kind-of stuck in the middle, and people kept pushing past us and walking around us, etc.  Two people, who were totally pushing their way to the front looked back sheepishly and said, "We're being a**holes."  To which I replied: "Pretty much."  Oh well.  It was still lovely.  The weather was PERFECT (at the end of August, it could have been a lot worse), the sunset was incredible, and it was just a delightful night.  

A panorama shot of the crowd and sunset

Here are a couple of other shots.  The iPhone does pretty well!  Not spectacular, but MUCH better than my old one.

A couple of quotes: 

"Salt Lake City?!"  "Just you f****n' wait."  And: "Does anyone here have a cell phone?"  They took some guys phone up on stage with them and took some pictures with it.  Pretty cool.

And the setlist:

Some Nights (Intro)

One Foot

Walking the Dog

All Alone

Why Am I The One

At Least I’m Not As Sad (As I Used To Be)

All The Pretty Girls

It Gets Better

Barlights

Carry On
The Gambler

You Can't Always Get What You Want (Rolling Stones cover)

We Are Young

Take Your Time

  

  Encore:

Some Nights

Stars

Good times.  That really was an excellent concert.

I also got to go to the O.C. Tanner Gift of Music concert with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, the Utah Symphony and James Taylor.  I put my name in for the lottery for that one too, and actually got tickets!  So I met my cute mom at the Conference Center last Saturday.  It was delightful!  And the programs were stunning--the typography, the printing, etc.  Gorgeous.  I took two.

It was also the same weekend as the first annual Salt Lake Comic Con, which was apparently very successful.  I took Trax downtown for the concert, and saw plenty of people dressed up, totally unashamed.  I have decided that Comic Con is like Halloween for adults, where you can dress up as whatever and whomever you want, and the treats are getting to meet stars and take cool pictures.  I'm down with that!  I'm a little sad I didn't make it more of a priority to go, because all of the pictures I have seen are awesome.  I'm sure it will be bigger and better next year, so I'll plan to get my geek on then.  

3.  Friends.

Speaking of Comic Con, my friends Diana and DeLayna went and met some cool people.  They are so funny; I love those girls.  DeLayna will be going to Japan shortly on a work assignment.  I'm so jealous!  How cool would that be?!  Speaking of . . . I need to finish watching season one of Newsroom!  Gah!  No time!

On the Saturday after the concert, my dear friend Jack Jason had a layover in SLC.  Peggy and I met up with him to have breakfast at Lamb's Grill downtown.  It was so lovely to catch up!  I was hoping to meet up with them in New York next month, but alas--I have no money, honey.  Especially after fighting with T-Mobile over an account I was assured was closed.  Grr.

JJD, Me and Peggy! 

We had a bit of a "Gaufre War," (get it?) in which we were to decide who makes the better waffle (see JJD's descriptions and lovely pictures here).  I was a little disappointed in the boys @ Saturday's Waffle, since they now have teenagers running it, so I was in agreement: the Belge wins.  Bruges Waffles is amazing (always get the gaufres liegoises!).  As we were walking down the street back to get his suitcase from his hotel, I totally biffed it.  CHEWING. ASPHALT.  My knees and my ego are still bruised and sore from that rather humiliating experience (um, I'm pretty sure my skirt flipped up over my waist, and there were plenty of people around to witness it!), but it was still worthwhile, and I'll just blame it on my cute-but-dangerous wedges.  These are two of my most favourite people in the world!  I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant seeing them!

4.  Family.

My last post may give you a hint as to the drama in the family.  It's kind-of quiet at the moment, but I think we are all walking on eggshells for a little while; at least until Mom & Dad leave.  Did I mention that they received their mission call?  They are going to Peru, and the leave ON THURSDAY.  Yikes!  It's coming waaaay too fast!  I'm excited for them, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to be in the opposite hemisphere!

Mom & Dad came down to SLC last week for their missionary training at the Church Office Building.  I was working while they were here (and they were some of the busiest days I have seen all year--no chance of leaving early!), and Mom had a wee health scare.  She had been short-of-breath, dizzy, nauseated, etc.  She got an appointment to see a cardiologist (not hers, but they still got her in the next day--a minor miracle).  Turns out that she was in atrial fibrillation, or her heart wasn't beating correctly.  She has had problems with the electrical conduction and scar tissue from her ASD repair in 1984 (which, back then, meant open-heart surgery).  When I had my PFO repair in 2004 (a very small version of an ASD), they were able to do it using a small catheter threaded up through the femoral artery.  Thankfully, I haven't had to deal with anything like Mom has, but she is a trouper. 

Anyway, they scheduled her for a TEE and Cardioversion the following morning.  Since Dad was still in meetings all day, we arranged for Allen to come home from work early so he could take Benji to school.  I was able to meet Mom @ IMC (my place of work, conveniently), where everything went swimmingly.  They did the shock to her heart, and they said it looks great now.  She will have a nuclear stress test this Wednesday, but they said she should be okay to fly out on Thursday as planned.  What a blessing!  I thought they would delay her a couple of weeks, but we are pressing forward.  I am so grateful we were able to get this taken care of so quickly and efficiently.  And I'm glad I was able to be at the hospital with her.  

I will be taking Benji up to Logan tomorrow for their 'setting apart,' which is a priesthood blessing given to a member of the church when he or she undertakes a new calling.  I am excited and nervous; these will be difficult holidays without them here.  They will be great, I'm sure.  It will be such an amazing experience for them.  There is nothing like living in another country to help you appreciate the life you have built for yourself.

****

And that's about it for now.  I can't believe I have written this entirely at work--after last week, it's hard to imagine things being as quiet as they have been for the past hour or so!  Please let me know what's going on with you.  Love to all!

To Live My Life As It's Meant To Be

A few pretty significant events happened this week.

First: Mom & Dad pushed the button. They have been getting everything ready to serve a mission, and all of the applications and forms are online.  I guess it takes a while to get it all done, and when you are ready, you push the button.  {Back in the 'good ole' days, when I served a mission, you "put in your papers" and received a large white envelope a few weeks later.}  They did it.  So they might be receiving a mission call soon!  I think the white envelope is still the method of delivery, even if the paperwork is outdated.  #feelingold  #ihatehashtags  #prettysurehashtagshavenopoweroutsideoftwitter  #isitreallythathardtousepunctuation?

Mom & Dad in Layton

Second: Dave & Lexy moved to Phoenix.  I know, right!?  When Dave sent out the e-mail a few weeks ago to tell us they were moving, I cried.  Most of the day was spent in tears . . . and it was enough to make me start taking my medications again.  Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for them and excited for their new adventures.  I can't wait to see their new home, complete with a swimming pool!

Moving Trucks :o(

Anyway, I drove up to Layton to see them off.  I was going to send Benji to school, but he has a cold and cough {which I so graciously bestowed upon him}.  I'll try to send him to school next week, though they will probably send him home.  This whole situation is driving me batty!  I have had to call in sick and Allen has had to come home early from work more than once to be with him since he can't be in school.  It has been almost two weeks, and there isn't a lot of school year left to be had.  Grrr.  Oh, back to the point--I had Benji with me, and Nanny & Papa drove down to so see them too.  On their way down from Logan, they picked up Pablo {Lexy's mom's boyfriend}, who is driving one of the trucks to Phoenix.  After they finished loading up the trucks, I left.  I didn't want them to see me cry.  It was really sad; we all love the Layton house, and now there will be strangers living in it.  Dave & Lex are planning on coming back, so they are renting out the house, and renting themselves in Phoenix.  Still, it's sad.  I miss them.  A LOT.

Dave, Lexy & Phoebe after the Savior of the World Performance

Also--they bought a minivan.  Yeah, there's a stigma, but they are handy and convenient and much more gas-friendly than the Suburban they have had for a while.  I'd rather not drive a minivan, but my cute car gets such horrible gas mileage that I'm about ready to trade him in.  I really like my car, and for having 98,000 miles he still looks really good; I just hate shelling out so much money at the pump.

Mom & Dad went to SLC after they left Layton, and I met up with them at Rachael's house.  We hung out for a while, but Mach is SO busy with her jobs and her calling and her piano playing--she is accompanying Lily's school program and has to be at rehearsals at least once per week.  It was nice to see her for a little while, but I had to leave to get ready for a LASIK follow-up appointment {still @ 20/20!  It's so lovely!} and an information meeting at the University of Utah I had that evening.

Third: I had a revelation.  Okay, it was not exactly a revelation as much as it was a "lightbulb" moment.

I wasn't expecting it, but the realization just came to me during this information session:

I know what I want to be when I grow up.

I have been thinking about this for a long time, but there were a lot of things going on and I wasn't sure I wanted to commit to anything as big as Graduate School and I feel guilty constantly about not spending enough time with Benji.  Well, during this information session, I had a few realizations.

A)  I'm not a great mom, in fact--I would be a crappy stay-at-home mom.  With Benji being home sick for the past couple of weeks, I realized just how hard it is.  Please don't get me wrong--I love Benji with all my heart--but he is not an easy child.  I get very impatient with him.  For example, getting him to put on his pants takes at least 20 minutes and a thousand reminders and "try-agains" to remind him of what he's doing, and to help him get it right.  After several of these sessions {i.e., every time he goes to the bathroom} and requiring his third shower of the day, I was so frustrated that I spanked him.  I felt so guilty about it and apologized and tried to give him extra loves and cuddles, but it doesn't change the fact that I hit my child.  I hope he has forgotten, but I never will.  Anyway, I realized that I am much more loving and kind to Benji when I don't see him as often.  He is much easier to love in small doses.  My realization was that I'm never going to be a good stay-at-home mom.  I'm just not.

B)  I have wanted to go back to school for a while, but I wasn't sure in what subject.  I like to do a lot of things, but I feel like you need to be passionate about what you study, if you are going to dedicate so much time and effort to it.  The only thing that has kept my attention for a long time is health care, and my education/career is at a crossroads.  I have been here for a while, learning and working, etc., but I haven't moved on.  It has been good, and I'm grateful for the experience, but I see so many people around me moving on with their lives, that I have felt the push too.  Being a surgical tech is great, but I don't want to do it forever.  There are some techs I work with who have literally been scrubbing longer than I have been alive {and I'm no spring chicken!}.  They are excellent at what they do, but most of them are tired and jaded and I don't want to end up like that.   So, the way I see it, I could take one of two paths: the Nursing Route, or the Physician's Assistant {P.A.} route.

As for nursing: I work with nurses every day; I have a great respect for them and I enjoy working with them.  I think I could be a good nurse, if I wanted to go down that road.  Here are the problems with nursing education as I see it: it's either good and {usually} expensive, or mediocre and cheap.  There are several nursing schools around the Salt Lake Valley, and I have friends who have gone to many of them.  The ones that are easy to get into are expensive.  Unbelievably expensive, especially for an associate's degree.  Salt Lake Community College {or SLCC, pronounced "SLICK"} is cheap, but incredibly competitive.  They have a waiting list of more than a year, and one can't even get on the list until all of the prerequisites are complete.  There was a partnership between the company I work for {Intermountain Healthcare} and SLCC, where IHC would pay for 100% of tuition and books in return for working full-time for two years after graduation.  That's an amazing opportunity, but they are dissolving this partnership because there are so many other nursing programs out there and the market is fairly saturated.  Many of my friends who have graduated have had difficulty finding jobs.  That's got to be really frustrating for people who have just spent a small fortune on schooling.  Also, my friends who graduated from the SLCC program do not recommend it to others.  It's not great.  Plus, I know I wouldn't be satisfied with being an RN; I'd want to go on and get a Master's and possibly an N.P., which would mean at least six more years of schooling.  So, this route is full of rocks and hard places.

As for the P.A. route: I have been talking about it for a long time.  Ever since I started working with PAs in surgery, talking to them and realizing what they do, I have had it in the back of my mind that I'd like to do it someday.  I have visited the UPAP {Utah Physican Assistant Program} website several times, and looking at the prerequisites and such, I have thought that it would be easier for me to get into PA school than into nursing school.  For example, most nursing programs require nutrition and statistics to get it.  I never took those classes, but I have taken calculus and Biochemistry {for heaven's sake, I have a Chemistry minor!}.  So what are the University of Utah's requirements?

• Bachelor's Degree, as this is a Master's degree program {I received my BA in Biology in 2007}
• Required Courses: Human Anatomy and Physiology {check and check}, four credits in Biology {one tends to get a few more than that, having a major in Biology} and eight credits in Chemistry {one gets more than that with a Chemistry minor}
• GPA higher than 2.7 {3.15 is nothing to brag about, but it meets the requirement!}
• Healthcare experience > 2000 hours, or about one year full-time {um, I have been working for Intermountain Healthcare for 11 years, plus working at the University Hospital before my mission would easily give me more than 20,000 hours}.

The lightbulb came on when I realized that my whole life has been preparing me for this.  I may not be the best candidate, but I would certainly not be the worst.  I think there's a real possibility of my getting in, and this is something I think I would be good at and enjoy--a rare and precious combination.  It isn't medical school, but it is a medicinal-type of education, and it is probably the best I could hope for at this stage in my life.

I came home and spoke with Allen about it.  I told him I was tired of nagging him to go to school, and that one of us needed to do something to move us beyond this point.  We talked about cost and commitment {and how he'll basically be a single dad for the entire time I am in school, and how he will still be responsible to pay all of the bills since I won't be able to work at the same time}.  He came up with plenty of valid excuses and reasons not to, including that "we'll be taxed to death" once I'm gainfully employed, but--what it comes down to--he will support me if I get in.  And with Benji being Benji, I couldn't do it by myself.  

So that's where we are.  I'm going to start the application process {it's a big one, with exams and essays and multiple rounds of interviews}, in hopes of admission to the program starting in 2014.  And we'll see.  I feel like this is the right direction, and for the first time in a long while, I'm excited for the future.  I hope you'll stick with me on this crazy ride.