27 June 2008

You've Gotta Be Crazy, Baby

Things have been a little nuts at work. The other night I was on-call (after already having worked a 12-hour shift), and ended up staying for 18 hours. It's getting a little out-of-control. Plus, they are putting me into cases that I have never done before (like mandible fractures, open AAA's, stapedectomies, etc.) and expecting me to fly. It freaks me out a bit, because most of the time I don't know how to set them up or what instruments I'll need. And the worst part is not knowing what the instruments are called--that was really difficult for me during training, and I haven't cracked my instrumentation book since I graduated. It's definitely easier for me to remember what the name of an instrument is if I've used it, and now--all of a sudden--I have used tons of new things (well, they're new to me). I'm also having to do quite a bit of heavy lifting--those ortho instrument pans are killer! So my shoulder has been bothering me more and more. It may have something to do with my "generous-sized baby" (that's what our pediatrician called him) as well. He currently weighs 18 lbs, 10 oz and is 26 1/2 inches tall. He's in the 95th percentile for both height and weight, so at least he's proportional.

Anyway, so I'm learning a ton at work (and mostly bluffing my way through all the new cases) and I'm trying to be a good mother, but the house is definitely taking the hit--I have no energy to clean. I need to vacuum in the worst way, but the only time I get to is when the baby is sleeping, and I don't want to wake him up. At least I did a load of dishes this morning--that's something!

I really need to go to sleep. That's one thing that I'm not appreciating about my 5pm-1am shifts--I'm not ready to go to bed until 2 or 3 in the morning because I'm so wound up. That happens even on days when I get off before 1am. Grr.

This picture of my little man is on the slideshow, but it's such a good one, I think it deserves a spot in this post. If it doesn't make you smile, YOU ARE MADE OF STONE.


23 June 2008

Updates

I have, once again, updated my picture gallery. You're welcome. I have put new pics in most of the baby albums, although some got more than others; I don't think Mia got any because she was looking pretty scrappy in most of them, and Beck wouldn't really appreciate that. :o) So . . . Allen shaved his head today. Literally. He has a little flaking problem, and I guess it was bad enough for him to cut it all off--I hadn't even nagged him to cut his hair recently. Life is certainly full of surprises. Benji is getting better. I sucked a fair amount of snot from his nose this afternoon, but it's nothing like what I was getting last week. Yes, his little nose started bleeding, and yes, I may be a bit too aggressive with the nose squeegee, but I really don't think that his mucous membranes have suffered permanent damage. He will survive to have his nose sucked out again, I am sure. So I visit teach a very interesting lady. She has a type of autism which makes her very emotional--she feels like everyone is judging her and "chewing her out." We have only been to visit her twice, but it is very draining for me. She is very needy, and she craves attention; she never feels like she's accepted or appreciated. It will be hard, mostly because I don't know if I'll be able to do anything right by her. She tells us her problems, but when we offer solutions or suggestions, she thinks we're judging her. I think it has been that way with a lot of people who have tried to help her; she's very intelligent and very spiritually minded, but she's also very judgmental--she thinks that everyone hates her and looks down on her. I'm not writing this to be rude; I'm just having a hard time knowing how to talk to her. My companion is great--she's closer to her age and she's just very positive. I want to show her love and kindness, but at the same time, I don't want her to become too dependent on me; maybe that's my problem. Maybe I am just here to love her and to help her to feel it. She's a wonderful person; she just has different needs. Any suggestions?

18 June 2008

"I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars"

Okay, I never really have been able to ride without holding on, but that's the song going through my head right now, so that's the title. I need to document this somewhere, and since this blog is basically serving as my journal at the moment, you--the lucky reader--get to serve as a witness. Speaking of witnesses, let's hope it doesn't come to that. As most of you know, I'm a surgical tech (commonly referred to as a "scrub"), which means I assist doctors during surgery. I manage the instruments and sponges and medications used intra-operatively. Ever since I came back from Maternity leave, I have been assigned to increasingly difficult cases. That's fine--part of what I love about my job is that I get to learn so much every time I work. Today I was assigned to a post-op bleed; the patient had back surgery yesterday, and wouldn't stop bleeding today, so they brought her back to the O.R. When I saw the assignment, I was pretty intimidated, because I have had very little training in orthopedics--I have basically learned everything on the fly. Some of the other scrubs I have spoken with said that's how they had to learn, so I figure that I'm just lower on the learning curve. I thought about saying something to my charge nurse (the one who makes the assignments), but I didn't. It was an exceptionally busy night, and I know she made the best and most appropriate assignments with the staff she had to work with. The case didn't really go smoothly. She was a relatively difficult intubation, and I am not very familiar with the spinal instruments we used. I also had to mix several batches of thrombin and gelfoam (clotting agents) on my back table, which was very messy and slow for someone who doesn't do it routinely (by the 4th batch, I did okay . . .). The surgeon was pretty patient with me, but I knew he was frustrated, too. So we spent more than an hour trying to make her stop bleeding, although that wasn't entirely successful either. As we were closing (re-suturing the wound), the surgeon found a fairly long blonde hair on the sterile field. That's bad. That's why we wear hats, masks, gowns, clean scrubs, shoe covers, etc. After pointing it out, he threw it off the field, changed his gloves, irrigated the wound with some antibiotic solution, and asked the anesthesiologist to give her more antibiotics intravenously. We finished the stitches and concluded the surgery. The hair could have come from the circulating nurse, who is also blonde, but it was probably mine, since I was physically closer to the point where and when it was found. I admit that my hair was not 100% contained. It is fairly rare that anyone's hair is, unless you're wearing a helmet or a beard cover; in fact, most people I work with have some stray hairs that sneak out from under their hats. I have never been told that my cloth hats are inappropriate, although I do have some hats that don't hold my hair back very well (the orange hat I wore today being one of them). I don't know what will come of this. If the patient gets an infection, it could possibly be traced back to the hair on the field. If there is an adverse outcome, on some future, unfortunate date, I may be called upon to testify in a trial, and I would have to admit some fault. I really hope it doesn't happen that way, but more than that, I really hope our patient is okay. She was miserable coming in to surgery, and I want her to get better. It makes me sick to think that I could possibly contribute to a patient's death; I do what I do to help people get better. Sometimes working in a hospital sucks.

12 June 2008

I Am The One And Only . . .

. . . Nobody I'd rather be. I finally replaced the Train CD with a mix album I have entitled "Mary's Sing-Along Songs," which includes "The One And Only" by Chesney Hawkes (click here for lyrics). {Sorry--I just figured out how to do links in my postings, and it makes me happy!} Anyway, I had totally forgotten about this song until I heard it again the other day. GOOD TIMES. I also have "Flowers In The Window" by Travis on that CD, which has a fantastic music video. Take a few minutes to watch it--if you have ever been pregnant, it should make you smile. Just so everybody knows . . . Benji is feeling better. He's still coughing a bit, but I'm not having to suck his nose out every couple of hours. And he drank a good seven ounces while I was trying to get him to sleep, so he should sleep through the night again! How did I get to be so lucky? I love that little guy to pieces. So all of a sudden, I have become a Celtics fan. No, I never was before, and admittedly, it is mostly because I'm rooting against the Lakers, but they are awesome! I love Paul Pierce (and no, I don't believe he faked that knee injury in Game 1). I have mixed feelings about Kobe Bryant; part of me just doesn't like him because he gets so much star treatment, but another part has to admit that he is a phenomenal player. An average night for Kobe is like an incredible night for 90% of most other NBA players. But the way the commentators talk about how great he is just irritates me. "Look at how Kobe is trusting his teammates." Hello?! It's a team. That's why Boston's going to win the finals--it's not a one-man show with them. Their defense is awesome and their spirit is unconquerable. You gotta love it, baby.

11 June 2008

My Little Man Is Sick :o(

It breaks my heart to see him so miserable. It hurts him when he coughs and he just looks at me with those big blue eyes, saying, "Make it stop!" It's just a cold, and he's on the mend now, but it's still hard. This is the sickest he's ever been. I took him in to the pediatrician, who said he looks fine to her (and he's 17lbs 11oz now . . . geez!!). So what do you do? He has been a little trouper, though. When he gets some tylenol, he's all smiles again, even though he's still coughing. He does hate it when I have to suction his little nose out, but he does realize it helps him. I'm pretty sure he caught it while playing with his cousins a couple of weeks ago.



Thanks, Lily!



I have updated most of my Picasa albums, so feel free to browse. There are some pretty good ones, if I do say so myself. There are some pretty dang cute babies in this family!

02 June 2008

I Love You Too . . .

I have been playing catch-up on my friends' and familys' blogs and man--I have the coolest people on my site. I didn't know that Arlynda was pregnant again (this will be numero 4), and I forgot how insightful you all can be. I just rattle on about American Idol and work and stupid stuff. Thanks for bringing me back to reality, y'all. I do just need to remind you how cute my baby is. No, I don't have any pictures at the moment (I'll try to get them posted tomorrow), and yes, he has been a bit grumpy because he's sick, but he's so flippin' adorable. He's curiously stiff for someone who doesn't even like to bear weight on his legs--I have to force him to bend (he's the opposite of Lily and Noah who are extra-flexy!). Sometimes he'll stand up, but he usually points his toes like a ballerina when I pick him up. I had him over my shoulder the other day, and he was looking at Allen, who was still in bed, and Benji just started cracking up! He totally was laughing at Allen for no good reason, so he made me laugh just listening to him. Benji also thinks it's funny when I change his clothes. He giggles when I try to pry his little arms out of long sleeves, like he's saying "Ha, ha, you think you can get me to bend my arms that way!" He has the cutest smile, and he's cooing at me. I love it. Sometimes I wonder if I can actually do the whole mothering thing, but when I look at my baby, I know that I wouldn't trade this opportunity for all the single fabulousness in the world.