Wake Me Up When September Ends

Change is in the air!  One thing I truly love about living in Utah is the changing of the seasons.  Each season has a distinct personality, and I love seeing nature's transformations.  It was a LONG, HOT summer, and it was a good one, but I'm very glad autumn is finally on it's way.  The colors of the trees are beautiful at the moment.  Spring is my favorite season, but Fall is a very close second.  I love it.

I do need to write about a few things, now that September is nearly over.  It has been a busy month, though now that "birthday season" is winding down, I feel less guilty about not documenting them.  I hope I didn't miss anyone, though I probably did.  Here are links to the albums for Noah's 5th birthday party ("Puss in Boots" theme), and for Tessa's 4th birthday party ("Barbie" theme).  Both were lots of fun, and Lexy and Rachael did phenomenal jobs putting them together, especially considering their extraordinary circumstances.  Mach had carpal tunnel release on her left (dominant) hand just a few days ago, and Lex just has a lot going on.  Bravo, ladies. 

I love this little tradition of the Niusulu family: we always take a picture of Rachael and Seuao giving the birthday girl kisses on the cheek.  It's so cute.  (Click on the picture for a link to the online album).

I helped out a little bit by making silhouettes (using GIMP) for each of the birthday guests.  It has been a learning process, but I really like the way Benji's turned out.

Kinda fun.  Anyway . . .

Back to Noah's party.  For months and months it was going to be an "Angry Birds" party, but a couple of weeks before, he decided he wanted to go with Puss in Boots.  More power to you, kiddo.  It was fun.  He may hate me someday for getting this picture, but I have so many fantastic ones of that photogenic child that one candle-blowing shot is okay.

Did I write about Dave's big 30th luau?  I don't think so.  He turned 30 on August 27th, and they had a big party on Labor Day weekend.  And boy--it decided to rain.  A LOT.  It was pretty epic.  In the album, there are a lot of pictures of people, but they are all interspersed with shots of the sky and the gathering clouds.  Kinda funny.  But there were some awesome rainbows to be seen afterward.  I love this picture of Dave, Lexy and Zeke.

Come to think of it, I don't think I wrote about Sabrina's birthday either.  We all went to Bear Lake that day, which was fun.  I don't know what it is; maybe it was getting over the "terrible twos," but Sabrina has just become the cutest stinking little fern.  Every time I see her she is just happy and hilarious and sweet.  This picture of Sabrina checking out the nailpolish she received for her birthday . . . it just cracks me up.  The look on her face is priceless.

And here's from the North Shore @ Bear Lake back in August.  The Sortor Girls are just amazing in the water--they went swimming almost every day this summer, and it shows!

Sabrina & Ella splashing in Bear Lake

Mia the Mermaid!

And here's one of all the kiddos.  I hope this will be a yearly tradition!  Yes, it shows my weakness as a photographer, because I don't know how to keep the background from becoming so overexposed.  Oh well--this one was the best of the pictures I took (Benji is actually looking up!).

L-R: Zeke (1), Lily (5), Noah (4), Benji (4), Tessa (3), Phoebe (3), Sabrina (3), Mia (4), Ella (8)

Oh, gads.  I still haven't blogged about the Bryant Family Reunion in Yosemite.  Or finished the Cruise, for that matter.  *sigh*  I don't know if I'll ever catch up.  Well, writing about it may or may not happen.  At least I have gotten this far (and at least I'm feeling well enough to do something)!

Turn and Face the Strange Ch-ch-changes

Riddle me this: why do I get sick at such inconvenient times?  I swear, I only get sick when my to-do list is unending, and thus have zero energy to accomplish any of it.  And I get further and further behind.  It was around September 6th when I started feeling really crappy; I left work early and sat on the couch all weekend (Grey's Anatomy marathon).  I tried to go back to work as scheduled the following Tuesday, but I didn't even make it four hours of my 12-hour shift.  I called in the next day too, and had the following Thursday off, in hopes of kicking it by then.  I had to go back to work on Friday, and while I did okay, I felt pretty miserable the whole time.  Saturday I felt a little better, and when I worked on Saturday night, I actually felt pretty good.  Yesterday (Sunday) I was very productive: I taught Relief Society, did several loads of laundry, two loads of dishes, made zucchini bread and a healthy dinner . . . and then I started feeling crappy again.  I guess I pushed it too hard.

I know I'm not supposed to run faster than I have strength, but I hate feeling sick.  I have too much to do to be running to the bathroom all the time.  Everything I eat goes straight through me (even pills come out the other end undigested, which I'm sure you wanted to know).  And as if being at war with the flora of my gut wasn't enough, I caught a cold at the same time.  I'm still coughing a little bit, but at least I have a voice now. 

And, all at the same time, we were house-hunting.  I had gone out with Marlene (our realtor) to see some houses, and I fell in love with one in particular.  By that evening, it was gone.  That was seriously depressing.  My #2 pick from that day was still available, so I wanted Allen to go look at it.  The Friday that I didn't leave the couch, he went to look at a few different houses.  He looked at the one I liked, but he hated it.  He found a house that he really liked, and he wanted to put an offer in on it before I had even seen it.  Seriously?  I made him wait until I saw it to submit an offer.  He did, and they counter-offered the next day, although they wanted another $500 in Earnest Money, with a 24-hour reply deadline.  He wanted to accept the counter then and there, but I needed some time to think about it (and to come to terms with the fact that I wouldn't be able to pay off my credit cards as planned).  I made him wait for at least 20 hours, because the whole thing was just moving so fast and my brain and body weren't in a good place.  How am I supposed to recognize what my gut says when it just feels sick and twisty?  I did pray about it, and my answer was to trust Allen.  I'm still not very happy with that answer; I'd rather know something for myself than rely on another person's opinion, even if that person is my husband.

So, um, I guess we bought a house.  My dad is helping us out with a down payment, and if everything goes through as anticipated, we will close on October 11.  It's still very surreal to me.  I wanted this, but I wanted to be a bit more involved in it, too.  Once Allen saw this house, he has done everything in his power to get it. It's all he talks about and thinks about.  He has been out to see it several times; I have only seen it once, and I wasn't feeling very well at the time.  I have mixed feelings about it, because of that.  Let's do some pros and cons.

Pro: It's a HOUSE, not an apartment.  Yay!
Con: It will definitely be more expensive (i.e., we'll be tightening our belts significantly)
Pro: The house was totally remodeled inside, and they did a nice job with it.
Con: The outside is very plain.  Zero personality.
Pro: We won't be surrounded by massive apartment complexes (much lower population density).
Con: The neighborhood is okay.  It's very middle-class in the West Valley/Kearns area.  A lot of the homes nearby need work.
Pro: It's on a cul-de-sac.
Con:  The backyard.  There is another cul-de-sac on the street behind the house, so from the backyard you can see about five other backyards from other peoples' homes.  Our yard is fenced in with chain-link, and there are no trees or anything to obscure this view.  Zero privacy.  I really don't like that, and I'm not terribly excited about forking out a bunch of money for a taller, vinyl fence.

And since I didn't have enough on my plate already, now we have to move.  And I have to figure out how we are going to furnish this place.  Our couches are NOT coming with us--they are in such horrible shape we can't even sell them.  They just need to go.  Plus, we have to clean up this apartment, which will be a nightmare.  Uggghhhh.  The next few weeks are going to be insane.  Again, I'm sorry for my lack of communication as of late.  I did publish a rant post I had left as a draft from August, but that's all I have for you for now.

She Works Hard For Her Money

*** This post was left as a draft back in August.  I'll just publish it as-is.

Today has been mentally and physically exhausting.  I'm at work, and it's 10:27pm.  I have mostly finished my Kronos training, but I also had to teach some orderlies.  Their stuff is different from ours (techs and nurses), so when they would ask questions, I would mostly say, "I don't know."  There is even an orderly "Super User" working tonight, but for some reason, she doesn't feel like she can teach other people.  The whole thing is a mess, it's confusing, and it's a lot of work.  And it's a pain in my you-know-what.  I can only do so much with the level to which I have been trained.

Speaking of training, the robot was a nightmare today.  The surgeon (let's call her Dr. P.) was in a terrible mood.  She was relying on her very inexperienced residents as her first assistants, and when they kept making mistakes, she would yell at them.  I felt bad for one young doctor, who was having a really hard time with spatial orientation in laparoscopy (a very difficult concept: imagine using a tool that you can only see on a monitor, but which moves in the opposite direction when you manipulate it, and having someone yelling at you and calling you a "retard" when you don't get it right). The rep was making things more complicated than they needed to be, the instruments she wanted weren't working or weren't sterile or weren't available, the patient was really bloody, and the circulators were inexperienced.  Cute Kristy had done some cross-training today, and those two cases made her the most experienced circulator available.  With all of the issues we had, it really wasn't fair to place that kind of responsibility on her.  Lacey (another scrub) and I have scrubbed plenty of robots, but neither of us are really familiar with circulator responsibilities.  And the rep (who is paid to know the equipment backwards and forwards, who is supposed to be able to answer all of our questions) was not helping.  She was trying to tell me what to do, at the same time the surgeon is giving me orders, and there was so much going on and so many things not working that everyone was frustrated.  Thank heavens for Doug (who had technically left for vacation already).  He came in to help us out and smooth things over.  I give him a lot of grief, but Doug really is a good guy.

Getting thrown into stuff you don't really know how to do is not an uncommon thing.  Actually, it happens a lot.  With many surgeries, you can draw on your previous experience and fake your way through it.  That's one reason why I like my job--I learn new things every day, and I get to use my brain to figure things out.  The robot really isn't like that.  I received a fair amount of training to scrub robotic cases, and I feel pretty comfortable doing most of them.  But there's only so much I can do without seeing the circulator side of things.  Reps (vendors who work for the companies of the products we use) are usually a great help, and they can be very knowledgeable.  Not this one.  We (nurses and techs) need more training on the robot, from someone who can actually answer our questions.

I want to be a good employee.  I want to prove myself as an invaluable part of the team.  I don't want to be a complainer or a tattle-tail; I want to help fix the situation.  First, the surgeon should have had a more experienced first-assistant (i.e., an attending physician, colleague, or someone who at least knows enough about the robot to be useful).  She also should have stepped back and calmed down, instead of yelling at everyone for things beyond their control.  Yes, a lot of things went wrong, and there's no one cause.  But verbal abuse is never called for, even if it is said 'jokingly.'  Secondly, the equipment needs to be ready and available.  Surgeons are notoriously impatient, so whenever we have to get something that isn't close by, they get even more wound-up.  Third, everyone needs more training.  Period.  Not just those who already do robots, and not just staff members who are willing to be trained.  It needs to be mandatory.  Until it is, and until our managers know how much we are struggling, days like this will be all too common.

I Am Spread Way Too Thin

It has been so long . . . I have so much on my plate and on my mind that I just haven't had time to get around to writing about it.  Here's a list of my thoughts (or mental to-do list), in no particular order:

• We are house-hunting, and I'd really like to move this month.  It's looking more and more like it won't happen that fast, which makes me sad because . . .
• My dear friend Sam (Elder Aubin, my Zone Leader from Liege), who lives in Germany, is coming to Utah in a few weeks to spend some time at BYU.  I wanted to have a little party/reunion/reception in his honor, at my home, and it's going to be a miracle if we can pull it off.
• I need to plan and organize this fete, but I'm still hoping we can get into a house!
• I'd like to go to the Brigham City Temple Open House (heaven only knows when I'll have the time, and it's being dedicated in a couple of weeks so there isn't much time left!)
• I need to get a temple recommend renewal so I can go to the dedication.
• I need to do my Visiting Teaching.
• I'm worried about Benji, who was sent home from school today with diarrhea.  He was sent home last week with a "suspicious rash" (which was just how his skin looks when he doesn't get lotioned).  Do I need to take him into a dermatologist to say what is normal and what isn't?  Why does he have diarrhea again?  
• I'm feeling guilty about how little I see my boy.  On the days he goes to school and when I'm working, I see him for a total of 45 minutes.  I get him up and dressed about 6:45am, feed him some breakfast and drive him to the bus stop.  I put him on the bus at 7:25am, and then I have to be to work at 11am.  When I get home at 11:30pm, he's already asleep.  It's depressing to be away from him so much.
• Allen is the one who takes care of him all afternoon, after having gotten up at 3:30am and working for 8 hours.  He puts him to bed and then goes to bed himself, and he can't be bothered to do any cleaning.  So when I get home at 11:30pm, the house is a disaster.  I usually spend a good 30 minutes cleaning (more when I have to do dishes), moving and folding laundry, putting the living room back together, etc.  It's pretty rare that I'm in bed before 2am.
• I'm going to be short on hours this week at work.  I was on-call all day Sunday and all day Monday, but I didn't have to go in.  And I'll have to stay home for part of my shift tomorrow, so I'll only have 20 hours for the week.  I have some PTO to fall back on, but I'd rather not use it all.
• I got my hair done yesterday; I went to Paul Mitchell, The School, in Holladay.  A co-worker is in school there, so I had her do my hair.  She did a pretty good job, but it took more than four hours.  I did have a Groupon, so I only paid $25 for a full highlight, and I didn't have any change, so I gave her a $20 for a tip ($45 total, plus the investment of time!).  That's the most I've ever given anyone for a tip (for anything), and although she did well, I hope she doesn't expect me to a) come back to her every time I need my hair done, and b) give her that big of a tip every time I see her.  If I had more $ coming in, I'd be happy to tip more, but for my income, that's a lot.  I may have put myself in a difficult situation.
• I need to catch up on my blogs
• I need to start packing
• I want to go to the State Fair, but I'm doubtful anyone will go with me
• I need to find a gift for Noah's birthday
• I need to start working on Christmas gifts
• I need to go back to school
• I need to get my national Surgical Tech certification
• I should probably become a CPR instructor, if I want to get into nursing school
• It would be a lot easier for me to go into teaching than it would to become a nurse (ironically)
• If I did go into teaching, I could probably spend more time with Benji.
• I need to convince Allen to go to school
• I wonder if I will ever get pregnant again
• I need to pay my bills
• I should cut up my credit cards
• I want to get real family photos this year; we haven't done that since Benji was an infant
• I need to figure out what is going on with my right foot (why does it swell so much more than my left?)
• I should exercise more
• I should get my bike fixed up so I can actually ride it
• I need to join Weight Watchers, like I told Dr. Witbeck I would
• I need to return my videos to the library (have you seen "Midnight in Paris"?  It's utterly fabuleux, and it makes me homesick for France.
• I want to catch up on my shows: Grey's Anatomy has new episodes on Netflix; I have purchased Glee (Season 3) but have yet to watch it, and I want to get Hulu+ so I can watch the new episodes of Breaking Bad and How I Met Your Mother.  I don't have time for any of it, but I really want to see them!!!
• I need a new vacuum.
• When (not if) we move, we need to transport the couches from Mom & Dad's garage to our new place, and they really need to be cleaned.  Do I need to get roof racks on my car?
• I definitely need to take Sylvano in for an oil change and tire rotation.  SOON.
• I need to go through Benji's clothes to take inventory for what I need to get for him during the upcoming consignment sale.
• I should sell and/or get rid of the rest, because who knows if I'll ever have another baby. 
• I need to figure out something to make for Peggy's Pinterest Party.
• I should give up the Diet Coke.
• I should go back to being a vegetarian.
• I hope nothing big happens before the end of the year (medically), so I can get LASIK!
• I need to read the scriptures
• I need to upload and edit my pictures
• I really want an iPad
• I can't believe it's September already . . . where has this year gone?
• I have to start getting my lesson ready for next week, because I (unwittingly) agreed to play the piano for the Dominguez Park Branch for the entire month of September; I thought it was a one-time, one-hour commitment, but it turns out it's a two-hour commitment every week.  At least we have Stake Conference this weekend and the Brigham City Temple Dedication on the 23rd, so I only have to do it three times.  Unfortunately, I am working every Saturday night before I have to play, and it starts at 10am.  So the 16th is really going to suck--I have Noah's birthday party on Saturday the 15th, I have to work 11pm-7am, I have to play the piano at the Branch from 10-noon, and I have to teach Relief Society at 3pm. 

That's all I can think of for now.  I've got a lot going on, and I'm just exhausted from everything.  So I'm sorry my blog has suffered.  Now I have to go set up for a leg fracture with Larky.  Good times . . .

She Was Making Other Plans

I know I have been MIA for a while.  I also know that I should be catching up on life events, rather than writing about stuff that only matters to me.  I guess that if you are actually reading (all two of you . . .), then maybe you do care about what I think is important.  So I guess I will keep writing.

I will catch up eventually; we got back from my family reunion in Yosemite National Park about 10 days ago, and I have been working a ton and I have been super busy with birthdays and such.  Also, I have been designated a "Super-User" for the Kronos WorkForce Services implementation at work (it sounds much more glamorous than it is, believe me), so I have had to sit down with about 20 different people and teach them how to use this new system.  Each session with a co-worker takes 30-45 minutes, and they did not allow for any overtime to get it done.  It has been a major project, trying to do my normal job and this training stuff when there is time, and when I happen to be scheduled at the same time as all of the people on my list.  And no, I'm not getting any compensation for it; I wasn't even asked if I wanted to do it (though I probably would have said yes).  I was walking into work one day and I was told that I had to go to this training, so I could teach other people.  Whatever.  It has been fine, just more to load onto my plate . . . because it wasn't full enough already.

Another reason why I haven't done more event-based blogging is because of the picture situation.  I love taking pictures of family events and I love creating beautiful photographs.  But it is a double-edged sword.  I want all of my pictures to look nice.  I don't want to upload unedited photos, even if it's just cropping and fixing exposure.  It bugs me when I don't do it, and considering the sheer numbers of photos I take, sorting through them all, finding and editing the best of them, uploading them, writing about them . . . it's a little overwhelming.  With my nieces' and nephews' birthdays, it's pretty much all I can do to 1) take the pictures and 2) upload them onto my picasa albums.  It's especially difficult during the summer, because once I'm done with one event, the next one is just around the corner.  So, folks, I'm sorry you don't get more pictures and stories.  I will try.

Okay, fine.  Here's a list of album links, in case you are interested (and in case I forgot to e-mail the links to you).

Ella's Birthday (8th Birthday Party on May 17, 2012)
Zekey's Birthday (1st Birthday Party on May 26, 2012)
Phoebe's Birthday (3rd Birthday Party on June 23, 2012)
Lily's Birthday (5th Birthday Party on June 30, 2012)
Day @ Hogle Zoo with Mach & Lex (July 19, 2012)
Family Reunion* (July 2012) *Warning!  Mostly unedited album, also including random pictures from vaycay!

Oh, what the heck.  Here are the links to Easter 2012 and Mother's Day 2012.  These kids are growing up so fast!  Of course there are lots of Benji pictures in each album, 1) because the boy is so stinkin' cute, and 2) because you never know when you'll get a really good one.  I actually found some great ones from last April that I had totally forgotten about.  And yes, between typing this sentence and the previous one, I had to  take 10 minutes to locate and edit this picture.  I got ones with better smiles, but they were out of focus.  Even so, this was worth it.

FYI, the shirt he was wearing in this picture is now permanently covered in stains from who-knows-what.  I have washed it at least 20 times trying to get it wearable again, all to no avail.  Gah!

This post turned out nothing like what I expected, but I guess that's the way life goes.  "Well you were happy where you were, but that girl, she reeled you in."  (Keane, Neon River).